Behaviour mangement in children a short guide.

Why do children misbehave at home or at school?

• Because they are bored- reported in TES that a third of schools bore their pupils. I suspect the same can be said of us parents !.

• Poorly explained and maintained boundaries.

• Lack of respect.

• Inappropriate teaching/learning or parenting style.

• Problems at home.

How do we change?

• Make the curriculum at school and activities at home  more interesting.

• Remember that boys in particular learn better when they are doing something that is more physically involved.

• Boys need competition to thrive.

• And for those of us that teach - it is an idea to have a no hands up policy, this prevents the same children answering all the time and encourages others to be involved.

• Meet and greet children as they arrive in the class-set the scene as the day starts- look for signs of unhappiness and try to sort before the lessons start. This can be the same if you are a parent and about to either go shopping or perhaps attend a big event like a wedding.

• As it often case of school every lesson is treated as a clean sheet. At home you can move onto a new activity and treat this as your clean sheet.

• Break your lesson /parenting day into small chunks- quiet and still/ physical - ie use hand clap game to brain storm ideas/ share knowledge in pairs. And if you are a parent at home perhaps a game of i-spy?.

• Agree firm fair boundaries and be consistent.

• Respect is a two way street.

• Maintain a child's self esteem .

• An activity that is fun will get done

When things go wrong 

• Deescalate the situation.

•  Gentle reminders- praise then a quiet reminder.

• Use child's name, maintain eye contact, say thank you but not please as this suggests you are asking them or pleading.

• Be aware of everything that is happening.

• Ask child- What should you be doing?Do not tell. A child's attention is maintained and they are taking ownership of the situation and their behaviour ( it is helping develop self awareness)

• Do not disagree with child- this causes an argument and leads to confrontation.

• Humour can sometimes deescalate a situation.

• Give child choices- right choice = praise, wrong choice = consequence.
  
  
  
  

Personal development

• Always seek help and advice - it is OK to say you need suggestions / help.

• Be critical of your own performance and teaching of your lesson if you are a teacher. If you are a parent it is pretty much the same really!.

• Observe other parents and observe your child's teacher if you help in their, class or another class or year group.

• Share knowledge and experience.

• Look for solutions to problems.

• Children can see if you lack confidence- appear confident and remember body language.

I don't have all the answers to behaviour management in children these are just a few useful tips. Your parenting style is up to you and no one can  tell you how to bring up your own child. Do what is right for your child at each stage in their life and take it easy and don't stress over things. Parenting is for life . It is a honour to be a parent and should not be seen as a chore.

Scoobits Scooter review

Why not jazz-up your scooter ready for summer?

A fun way to personalize your scooter, the first ever collectable scooter accessory.

Scoobits are the latest accessory craze to hit the school run this year. Scoobits are a unique range of cute, colourful characters that kids simply strap onto their scooters making them their own. Scoobits personalise scooters, making them stand out from the crowd on the school run and in the playground.

Appealing to both boys and girls aged three years and over, Scoobits are packed with kerbside credibility and personality. They feature a range of popular characters to collect, swap and trade.

Scoobits simply attach to the scooter and hold firm thanks to its clever badge and strap design. Made from tough, durable 100% silicone, Scoobits do not contain UPVC and are safe, soft and squidgy for little fingers.

And don’t forget, Scoobits are not just for scooters. Children can 'scoobit' their bike, trike, or personalise school bags. So why not collect them?

Affordable at just £3.99, there are nine Scoobits characters to collect and swap. They are ideal for pocket money purchases and party bags.

I think they are a brilliant product to encourage your child not to be taken to school by you in the car enabling you to walk while they scoot!. You could always get a scooter of your own I have seen many an adult scooter reviewed on the Gadget show!

To see all the Scoobits characters and stockists go to www.scoobits.com.

Nakd bar review

With the emphasis on healthy lunchboxes now it is refreshing to have a healthy alternative to that chocolate covered biscuit. I often see what is put into children's lunch boxes as I work in a school , and they all enjoy sweet treats and chocolate covered bars( Many schools allow chocolate biscuits as it not seen as a sweet, yet they are really !) . Children seem to understand about healthy food and many school have  good policy on healthy eating. My own son is now conscious of your GDA . 

What are Guideline Daily Amounts? IGD established GDAs between 1995 and 1998 Guideline Daily Amounts (GDAs) are guidelines for healthy adults and children about the approximate amount of Calories, fat, saturated fat, carbohydrate, total sugars, protein, fibre, salt and sodium required for a healthy diet. GDAs provide companies with a consistent approach to nutrition labelling. They give consumers additional information which they can use to gain a better understanding of their daily intake of specific nutrients. GDAs are not targets for individuals to consume, but a guideline or benchmark to help them make dietary choices and balance their daily intake. For example, consumers can use them as a basis against which to judge the contribution of fat made by a particular food product to their diet.

Therefore when I was offered the Nakd bars to try I knew they would be put to good use; from J taking one to school as a healthy change from a sausage butty: to a boast after he was put through his paces at rugby.. The Nakd bars are different as they are 100% natural ingredients, they are wheat, dairy and gluten free and are full of goodness. The bars come in seven flavours Cocoa Delight, Cocoa Mint and the award winning* Cocoa Orange. Or try something a little fruitier with Berry Delight, which combines raw dates and cashews with raisins, raspberries and natural berry flavouring. Alternatively discover the delicious flavours of Cashew Cookie, Ginger Bread or Pecan Pie. Go on I can't resist saying "mmmmmm pie' and no I am not a simpson character!


"Nakd bars are a 100% natural whole food bar. A delicious blend of unsweetened fruit, rolled oats, nuts and spices. Nakd bars contain no artificial ingredients of any kind, no-added sugar and are made raw, never cooked. In fact if they were any more natural you'd have to peel them. They are a combination of natural superfoods with nothing artificial, so they are good for you in lots of ways. Rich in phytonutrients from raw plant foods to promote a healthy immune system and body function. Natural source of essential vitamins and minerals like B-vitamins, vitamin C, potassium, calcium, magnesium and iron to help provide energy, support a strong immune system, strengthen bones, and combat stress and ageing. High fibre to help balance blood sugar levels, control appetite and aid digestion. Plant-source protein to help maintain muscle, support metabolism, balance blood sugar, and control appetite."

We were sent the entire range to try out, obviously some flavours that were more popular than other. I bet you can guess what flavours they were., yes that's right  the cocoa ones !.

Nakd bars are suitable for people who have diabetes and also people who are coeliac as they are gluten free.

There were one or two flavours J and I were not keen on and this is no way reflects on the bars in general. They make ideal snacks and are great for lunchboxes , they are also ideal if your are out walking too as they will give you a natural burst of energy. Available from most supermarkets you can find out more about Nakd on their Facebook page.

(as you might of guessed I was sent these bars to review !)

Bullying .... and school reunions

I logged onto facebook to find there had been a school reunion, no I hadn't missed it I hadn't been invited. They say school days are the happiest days of our lives, I enjoyed school mostly. Though what I really hated was the bullying, now I wasn''t bullied by the friends from the reunion, I was bullied from an early age all the way from Lower School to Upper school. Its horrible you have low self esteem and you are a social outcast.

I remember one occasion when the children in my class did a survey to see who liked me , finding this out set me on the life long feeling on ;feeling unworthy, being the social outcast, not being the popular one. Now I understand being at school is not all about being popular but you have a basic right to be happy, and there is nothing crueler sometimes than children.

Yes I am an only child and no I DON'T have only child complex I had a range of hobbies and wide circle of friends at school, the odd one was a good friend ( of which I do keep in contact with still). I suppose to some friends I was the token odd ball that they kept as amusement to show those around them they were a charitable case.

If you let it twitter and facebook can be like that too, you have the popular people on twitter and facebook and dare I say even the bullying and being the social outcast. I haven't being bullied on twitter though I have been made to be the social outcast. I have made some good friends on twitter and I have even met one of them. Are you griped with panic if someone un follows  , do our own insecurities make you panic. is twitter your last bastion; your refuge from the real world,your comfort blanket?.  Twitter is a tool and not a friend that needs to be used in the right way.

And on facebook yes I will be your friend if we have similar interests but no I don't want to be a farmer or indeed run a cafe. That's for you and not for me, I have enough trouble sometimes living in the real world.

I do sometimes wonder indeed if I make a difference a bit like 'Wonderful Life' I am sure I do . The work and effort I put into my job surely makes a change to someones life.  I enjoy solitude and sometimes may run a mile when a social occasion is presented to me. Is there a result of a troubled school life, if Sigmund Freud was around he'd probably say it relates to mother issues. And trust me I don't wish to go any where with that one, bearing my soul for the whole of the social media world I don't think so . A tortured genius , yes that's how I will think of my self my school friends never really understood me at all. So I am like the great Beethoven not in a musical way of course as my piano and harpsichord lessons never turned me into a concert pianist much to the disdain of my piano teacher 'Mr Bond'

So if you don't comment , I am going to think you are not my friend ; Social media mugging of course : I take no prisoners!.

How to handle a tween /teeenager

While eating our dinner in town I had this conservation with J... he's 12 going on 40.

"Have you ever sworn at school?" I asked.

Stunned silence.

"Well? There is no point in lying to me!" I added.

More stunned silence.

"I know enough people to tell me" I quipped.

J just sat there with a look of amazement and bewilderment.

"Yes " said J.

"Which words?" I adventured to ask.

"The F word is one of them...." said J now looking towards the door.

"Well DON"T do it again because..." and before I had even finished J chimed:

"Because you know enough people"

So there you are a investigating technique that actually works , now my child is not one of those who hangs on street corners and riots. He is a all out academic that plays every sport going and is the teachers model pupil. It is however social pressures around him that makes things change so I will be with him every step of the way to gently guide him in the right way. The next social hurdle is when he is 13 he wants to go on facebook.

And you must read this hilarious post about swearing ( Caution contains a swear word ) Thanks to In the Powder room for the link.