Being Autistic To Me Is Like Wearing 2 Hats

Firstly I’ve always been autistic I didn’t suddenly wake up one Spring and thing “ Ooooh I feel different now “ I’ve always been different and it’s my different. Childhood was clunky I mean not many 3 year old years just sit and watch classic films.It was  70 s and no one battered an eyelid you were either good , bad , troubled or aloof somewhere in between.

I was the aloof one the one who at ballet thought collecting imaginary shells from the seashore was a whole load of hell .I have the coordination of a hippopotamus from Fantastia so no ballet wasn’t for me.

The struggles of academic life were always there as I had all the ideas and brightness but couldn’t actually communicate my ideas on paper. And maths was my mortal enemy I couldn’t do it however much I tried , it was only later I discovered I’ve got disculia. I was the weird genius type who knew all the answers.But just because you know the answers actually applying yourself in a comprehensive way on paper is hard.

Friends were a mismatch as I was the weird one who liked Dungeons and dragons and museums.Being autistic as I was obviously that way from birth when you get to school especially myself it was if I was prey on the African plains. I found children could sense I was different and would go in for the attack physically and verbally.This pattern followed me all through school I’m sorry to say.

Career wise it was the same pattern with work colleagues with must not understanding my aloofness.I feel that I’d be very good at coding or something like that because I’ve great attention to detail when I need to

So you see I wear two hats the one where I didn’t know I was autistic and the one where o found out I was autistic and the good thing about those two hats is that one fits upon the other making one combined hat.

But I endeavour like an adventurer through life because it’s one life and I’m going to make it count.

Why I Love Cats

Why I Love Cats

I have always been a cat lover. I love all animals  except this one time when I decided to let my sister in laws rabbit bounce bounce in the front room because it was giving me sad bunny eyes from its hutch.But the problem came when it had obviously tasted freedom it just wouldn't go back in its hutch and I couldn't pick it up and had to put a washing basket on it to trap it and then it hopped around moving the washing basket as it went.I rang my husband to come home from work to help me deal with it. Cats really are my favourite, I find random cats everywhere though cats are never random more sheer bloodyminded springs to mind.I love that cats come in all shapes and sizes , my late Aunt had a cat called Kit and if it sat on your lap your never moved as it claws sunk it ( it didn't want you to move )  Cats have such majestic swagger and totally don't care as they walk away having shredded your kitchen roll or toilet roll , cat feels no shame they're proud of their misdemeanours.I have had many cats over the years from my childhood cat that just to knock on the letter box to come in to Rollie who died a few years ago who was an absolute evil devil in the fluffiest way.

And I love cats because they are part of my exercise routine as the cat will come in through the cat flap and demand to go out the front door.All because it thinks the weather will be different on the other side of the house !

And my cat can look like my bank manager by keeping an eye on my purse as I puruse the internet then viciously her followed by a pair of slippers everywhere on the internet.

And I love the fact is obviously a fine food critic and can at the drop of a hat detect that the shed load of his favourite food has had a sudden change of recipe ( even though it hasn't ).And did you know that cats are actually closet interior designers I mean talk about keeping your light under a bushel.They will immediately alert you  to out of date trends in furniture and wall covers by clawing at them till you find something they approve of.It is a very expensive process but a true artiste always suffers for their art , it is the true encapsulating nature of a genius.

A Glimmer Is All That you Need

Today today oh the blue sky oooh how i love the blue sky it is very blue and so uplifting as I was beginning to think i was living in Mordor under the eye of Sauron.Some people love Winter and they cling to it with all their might now I don't mind it if I can at least see some sort of sky it doesn't have to be blue ( that is a delightful bonus ) but I would rather it was not the inky dark chasm of doom over my head.

So celebrate the glimmer of blue sky shout shout how glorious it is ! Blue sky makes you do appreciative I think as I spy the buds on the tree that will spring into a riot of colour. ( not this tree as it’s a Fir ) but the tree in my garden.

Just Give Me beans On Toast

Just give me beans on toast this Valentines !



Slap an extra twenty pounds on a bunch of flowers in the name of romance , romance yes romance that language of money come the 14th of February and though while people say you can't put a price on love this seems to be the opposite in the emails I am seeing.I have even had an email for a bike for valentine which yes is very practical but I already have a bicycle I am much more one for practicality and yes there is romance in practicality one year at Christmas I had a Dualit toaster and you know many years later that toaster is still going strong ( I love my toaster very much ) I feel like some sort of toast soothsayer .

Prior to Valentines this year we rand away to Stratford upon Avon not to join the Royal Shakespeare Company but to have a general amble around the sights of this lovely place and you know that Shakespeare is a right little entrepreneur as they even charge to see where he is buried there is a very nice little old lady who asks you what you wish to pay and then you pop and see his grave.I love the freedom to to stuff as as when I choose which I am very lucky to be able to do.


Valentines I feel is just a commercial licence to print money and don't given get me started on the "Bae mine " wordings on things ! .I had not even given any thought to what I shall be eating this Valentines as a parent of a son at university my cupboard is bare.Beans on toast yes I could have beans on toast but cut the toast diagonally just to mix it up and be exciting.

I am thinking I could do with a nice set of kitchen knives and yes that could be a Valentines present , practical is as practical does and no beating around the bush.I remember having one person I knew where for Christmas they gave each other a shed between themselves ( not a shed each ) .

And this weekend what is termed Valentine weekend I am going to a football match , I have no idea of the rules but I won free tickets and it is an opportunity to get fresh air.Last week I went to the Halle orchestra having won some tickets to see the orchestra preform some Nashville music .

So I wish you the perfect anti Valentine’s Day 

Photo courtesy of Jane from 

onions and paper blog  do pop over to her from great cards and tasty recipes.

The Joy In Small Things

Sometimes you have to take joy in the small things, and this is something I'm continually proud of. To find things that bring me joy and to celebrate the small accomplishments as well as the big ones.

A giggle Yes a giggle , laughter is often the best medicine they say and last week saw me entering a text competition but silly me I mistyped the number and somehow ended up signing up to a sex dating service .I got a reply saying “ did I want to get down and dirty” I made sure I put a stop reply straight away.The only getting down and dirty I do is cleaning my kitchen.

The cat is a constant source of amusement

And my son who is at university asks for pictures of the cat rather than pictures of us ! 

I love charity shops I breeze round them after I’ve been say to the gym &  survived the gym should I say.And I find the weirdness of life that is filtered out like a stuff plug hole the the stuff that just won’t go down the plug hole.

And the little things of joy build up like a set of nesting dolls much like the ones I found today.